Confusion

Perhaps I’m jumping the gun here, but I decide that I’d like to call Heather tonight, and see what her plans are for Friday. I dial, the phone rings a few times, and she picks up. I say it’s me, and qualify that with "The guy from the train." She laughs, and sounds happy to hear from me. When I ask if she’d be interested in getting drinks tomorrow, she says that she doesn’t have any plans. The only thing, she says, is that she has to drop off her husband at the airport around four. After that, she’s clear.

I hesitate briefly, and ask if it’d be ok for me to call around 5 PM. That seems to be fine, and I say I’ll talk to her tomorrow. Hang up.

Befuddlement.

Earlier in the day, on the bus – the really helpful guy was commenting on how nice her tattoos were. She showed him a few, one of which included the "ring" that was tattooed on her finger. She said that that one, she was getting removed.

What I need here, is to figure out if I’m being a typical guy and drawing too many conclusions when I shouldn’t be. I’m confused about tomorrow, and what "going out for drinks" actually entails. Now, me? Typically, I am not one to receive invitations to drinks from strangers. In fact, I think this is a first for me. So of course, I’m flattered. Naturally. Is this going to my head? Was the invitation simply a friendly gesture, a platonic invitation?

A question that crosses my mind is: why would someone who’s married suggest to a stranger that they go out for drinks sometime? Is this too male a thought process? Am I overlooking the possibility that she just found me cool, and wanted to hang out, to get to know me better as a friend? Am I letting my own attraction to Heather influence how I’m reading this situation? Am I being sexist in my presumption that an invitation to drinks implies interest, and not just friendship?

I also keep wondering if I somehow misheard her, when she said "husband" on the phone. But that’s just me being pathetic, and reaching for fucking straws, I think.

Right now, I’m fairly confused. I liked talking with Heather, as briefly as we hung out, and found her funny and energetic and quite stunning. But it looks as though she’s married, and tomorrow is a platonic hanging out event. I’m unsure what tomorrow holds, and how I should even feel right now, in preparation.

There’s a big part of me that, against all logic, hopes there’s some romantic interest that exists. But I’m trying not to succumb to that. Perhaps it’s me being single for so long. The first person that expresses interest in me, I automatically assume there’s some romantic subtext. She was quite cool to talk with, and I am immensely flattered that she liked me enough to want to hang out and get drinks.

Right now, I’m working hard to view tomorrow as a platonic meeting, where we’ll both chat, have fun, and just hang out. And, hopefully, I’ll eventually meet her husband who – if her personality is any indication, will be equally fun and cool and interesting to get to know.

The fact that I gave her the address to this blog complicates things, but I’ve also tried not to think about that as I write this.

The more I think about it – the more I realize that someone as cool as her can’t possibly be single. Married. Hanging out. Friends. I’m accepting it.

I’m a horrible liar.