I hesitate to put these thoughts down into words, for fear of jinxing things… but I’ve felt really solid about work lately.
I still have my worries and concerns (and my seemingly never-ending supply of Imposter Syndrome). But the past week or so has given me a feeling of both accomplishment and confidence.
I’ve had several positive moments where I’ve caught a bug, or spotted an error that might have gone out to our production environment. And it felt great. I work with a lot of incredibly talented developers – and I say this not in an attempt to say that I’m somehow better than them.
Rather, in the last few weeks I feel like I’m rising to their levels. I feel very positive about my contributions, and more secure in what I’m able to bring to the table.
It’s been interseting, observing myself and my thoughts lately. There’s a vast difference between how I view my work now, versus 9+ months ago. I still have my less than optimal days, where I worry and fret – but the ratio of good to bad seems to be shifting, more towards the good.
The Start of the Calm