Surprisingly Calm

I took some time off last week, and this week… I’m finding myself surprisingly calm.

Ok, “calm” may not be the exact best word here. Less stresed? Less frantic? There were deadlines at work, and I think the rush at the end of the week got to me… but I didn’t have that gnawing feeling in my gut, and that whispering voice my head saying “you’re running behind, you’re running behind” repetedly.

I worked a lot, but that sensation of need/urgency wasn’t there. Or at least, wasn’t quite as strong as before.

I think I have an unhealthy relationship with work, particular when it comes to sprints. They feel like personal promises/commitments, and the idea of a story spilling over feels like I’m not doing my job.

Which is, of course, not true. But it’s hard to shake that feeling.

All that aside, it did feel a little less rushed. Trying to reflect on things, to see if it’s a change in my approach or point of view. I’m hoping this is the start of a trend or new phase, and I don’t slip back. And that the sound of that ticking clock gets a little softer, each week.

[Photo via John Mark Arnold]

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