The Space Between Projects: Relaxation, Contemplation, and an Inability to Stay Still

Today marks one of the first days where I truly feel like I’m on the mend, from this infection thing. I started to feel marked relief on Sunday, and by Monday afternoon my head was truly starting to clear. It’s amazing how something so small (in the roof of my mouth) could be so all-consuming, so all-encompassing.

Not really being able to concentrate on things was a huge drag, and made me very irritable. I was difficult to talk to (ask Liz), and was generally in a sour mood for many days. So to be past all that and to be coherent again, able to think clearly again – it feels great.

A few days ago, on Saturday, I gave my 20×2 talk. Prior to that, in late September, I ended up launching my Underviewed.com project. All my big projects are done, and now I’m finding myself left with nothing to do.

There is the house, of course. That’s kind of an on-going thing. I’ve neglected it a great deal these past few weeks, so it’s time to refocus some attention towards our home.

But it’s a weird feeling I have now. I have extra time, and what seems like extra brain cycles that aren’t being utilized. I’ve tried relaxing a bit – watching a few movies here and there. I’ve been playing Hearthstone more lately. But despite my wanting to take a break, I’m feeling… itchy. Impatient. I feel like I’m sitting still, and I don’t like it.

There’s a part of me that thinks I should be spending less time creating, and spending more time iterating. Going back and improving on prior work. There are a few login issues I’ve gotten reports about, and I’m tempted to go back in and refactor my Augur app and do it over using Angular (and Twitter Fabric).

Another part of me wants to seek out speaking engagements. I like doing it, and I’d like to do it more… and so applying to various conferences seems like a good next step. Maybe not for code, but for… blogging? Writing? I dunno.

It seems that I find a great deal of happiness making stuff. And the idea of being able to just make stuff is a very attractive one. Although I have no idea what that business model looks like. Without any kind of viable products to show, at the end of the day we’re really just talking about patronage, right? Anyone know of anyone out there that’s doing this, successfully? Just curious.

I don’t know if I like learning things, but I sure do like making things. And as a result, to make cool stuff… I need to learn a lot of new things. Despite the lull I find myself in, it seems somewhat reassuring that my mind is impatient.

Don’t get me wrong – I’ve spent some time eating Sour Cream and Onion potato chips while watching Blade on HBO Go. But even as I’m sitting there, with salty fingers and glazed eyeballs… there’s a part of me that’s trying to plan out what I’m going to be doing next.

[CC photo via Chris Wilson]

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